You’re probably fully aware of the price you’re paying for your anxiety. It’s not just the emotional pain; it’s the damage to relationships, it’s the lost opportunities, it’s potentially a dismal future where you fail to fulfil your potential.
You also know how difficult it seems to be to get rid of your anxiety. You’ve tried the quick fixes; you may have bought books and programs that brought only limited benefits. You may even have paid to see a traditional counsellor or therapist and yet here you are, reading yet another page about overcoming your anxiety. You might have blamed yourself. Why couldn’t you just get rid of it? Why couldn’t you rationally think your way out of it?
Firstly, none of this is your fault.
Science now tells us that anxiety is not just one thing – it varies from person to person. Different brain regions can be involved in your anxiety – they all have different roles to play, and each of them is capable of learning. This learning is done automatically by your brain and is outside of your conscious awareness.
Imagine a creature suddenly finds itself in an extremely threatening situation. It takes action and gets away. The brain then remembers, so that if it ever faces a similar situation again it can automatically take the same action. Your brain can learn much more advanced patterns than other animals, but the mechanism is essentially the same.
Now, the modern human brain is very complex, but this ancient mechanism is very simple by comparison, so it can sometimes get things wrong, by learning patterns that aren’t useful, or by reminding you unnecessarily, making you feel anxious for no apparent reason.
The different regions of your brain work in different ways, so the way to effect change will vary between them; a technique that works for one region might have no impact on another. For example, rational thinking, or willpower is only applicable in some cases, and some parts of your unconscious mind will just ignore this strategy. It’s crucial that you use the right techniques for those regions in your brain that are causing your problems.
This sounds complex, but it can be straightforward if you know where to look.
It starts with your awareness. You need to be aware of what’s going on in your own head, as it happens. When you’ve identified which parts of your brain are causing your problem you need to find tools and techniques appropriate for those regions in order to make the changes. Some changes can be done very simply, while others require new learning, which takes a little application and time.
You have a simple choice.
Either you can read all the books (just the ones with the useful and current information) and figure out what’s going on in your head, and then select the appropriate techniques.
You can work with somebody like me who can help you quickly identify what’s going on in your brain, pick out those tools or strategies that are most likely to be relevant to you, and then help you to put them into action.
Some of these techniques are quick and straightforward to use, and results are obvious. Other approaches require your brain to learn new patterns of thinking. This will take time, which is where a coach can be really helpful. You just need to do what is necessary (and keep doing it) to get the results.
Only you will know if you are sufficiently tired of your situation to want to make a lasting change.
If you’ve reached a point where you want to take some action, consider contacting me and let’s find out if what I can do could benefit you. Let’s have a conversation to help you decide whether working with a coach like me could be the right solution for you.